A person is a person no matter how small

We have had some family and friends not even acknowledge Cooper's death. No phone call or email. No contact whatsoever. I know for most of them it is because they do not know what to say. But a few comments that I have gotten and read on a forum that I belong to make me think some may believe it is not that big of a deal. "Pregnancies are lost all the time" and "You did not know him that long so it should not be that hard". Some act like it was not a loss at all but a health issue. Nothing could be farther from the truth. It may be different if you lose the baby early while it is still a fertilized egg but at some point that egg turns into a child. People will ask how I am doing but not ask how Matt is doing. While I appreciate people asking about me, Matt is hurting just as much as I am. Many people are devastated by the loss of Cooper. I have gotten a few comments that at least I was young enough that I could just try again. You can not just replace a child. That's not how it works. He was a person not a pregnancy. Can you replace a parent when they pass away? I think not. A person is a person no matter how small. When someone passes away, people take comfort in the memories of that person. I wish I had more time and memories with Cooper. 22 hours was not enough for me.

Tar Heel Football

Although I am very excited to see what the Tar Heel football team is going to do this year, I am somewhat dreading it. When the Chick fil a match up of UNC vs LSU (the first game of our season and over labor day weekend) in Atlanta was announced, Matt and I were psyched. But then when we got pregnant with Cooper we realized his due date was Sept 7th and just days after the game so going was out of the question. I soon realized that most of the football games would be out of the question for me as well with Cooper being so young. My brother Kenny was going to go to the games with Matt and Davis in my place. I would be at home with my little boy. Then in May we lost him. Now Matt, Kenny and I are going down to Atlanta for the Chick fil a game which I have fixed feelings about. And then we will make six trips to Chapel Hill for home games during the fall. The stadium is just steps from UNC Hospital. As bad as it will hurt every time I go back to Chapel Hill and walk by the stadium, it is still extremely special to me that Cooper lived his life there. Its where his Mommy and Daddy met and fell in love eight years ago. I smile thinking about how Cooper is up in heaven wearing Carolina Blue wings because he was a true Tar Heel just like his Mommy, Daddy and big brother.

Really?

I was talking to a friend who was telling me how a family member and other relatives were very upset that that a family member was expecting a girl and not a boy. This of course made me upset. All children are gifts and the only thing a future parent should worry about is that the baby coming into the world healthy. There are so many people out there that should not be parents. They are not mature enough to have children and have not thought about what it takes to raise a child emotionally and financially. And there are so many couples that can not have children that would be terrific parents. It's not fair. I can not help but be angry when I see parents neglecting their children. I know there are reasons for everything but I can not help but think what could be a good enough reason.